his reply doesn't come immediately, because his immediate reaction is no, absolutely not, but equally he knows that he can't stop her. he knows that if he doesn't help, someone else will, and he'll be shut out from anything in the future. this isn't like melissa, where he could just web her bedroom window shut and know that would be it for an hour or so.
he knows what it was like, being eleven's age and wishing he was able to change things. he'd been a lot more selfish, a lot more arrogant, but the underlying desire had been the same.
there's the question, though, of whether her lantern would go with her, whether the mental representation of herself would be enough to harm her given the physics of this place are different to the laws and physics of earth.
(he hopes not. there's a chance it's safer here than it was back there.) ]
[ who's billy? is one question, but it's not one he asks because that doesn't seem to be the important thing here.
(god, he hates it when things are serious, with a capital-S, and it's not something he can avoid, or deflect, or evade, or joke about. eleven's a child, and all of his coping mechanisms for discomfort would be insensitive.) ]
I don't need to tell you this doesn't make me very comfortable, right? I mean, I get it. You want to help. You think you can help.
You saw the messages - someone knows where he is. They're saying he's safe. So what happens if Riku doesn't want to be found right now? Doesn't want to be seen?
[ She's marches straight there, a storm in her eyes, and heart hammering in her chest like the drums of war.
Eleven is scared - but determined, too. And she wants to ask Peter to be there, to watch over her when she sits down and blindfolds herself and listens to the static and goes in the Void in her mind, so she knows that if something goes wrong, she can tell someone out loud...
But maybe it's dumb to ask him, now.
Maybe she will do it more like Bruce. Carry things alone in the dark. Accept help if offered, don't ask for it. Become familiar with the pain, and become stronger because of it.
Maybe.
Those are the thoughts she's lost in when she makes it to the bridge, looking around for Peter's bright light in the dark. ]
[ at this point in his life, dealing with headstrong children really shouldn't be a shock, and yet somehow he always manages to feel a little blindsided. despite it all, it makes him miss being a teacher — actually being a teacher, although he knows it wasn't something he'd have been able to keep up long-term, not with the number of absences he'd had and last-minute phonecalls due to being quote-unquote sick.
which means: he hurries to the river, determined not to miss eleven, not to leave her waiting. he thinks that if he does, she'll do something reckless. something he'll end up feeling responsible for because he said the wrong thing, or wasn't quick enough, all because she's just a child and she wants to help.
he knows, loosely, what she's capable of — not with this, but in terms of sheer strength, and he knows that if it came down to it, he might not be able to stop her.
when he gets there, then, he's breathless; his eyes are wide and searching and his hair messy, as if he's just run a hand through it in a vain, vague attempt to make himself look a little more presentable and half-assed it, not entirely bothered with the result. not for the first time, he thinks that something like this would be a hell of a lot easier back in new york. ]
—Eleven! [ is what he calls out when he spots the glow of a lantern on the bridge; it's a little too far away for him to pick out details, but the likelihood of it being anyone else are pretty slim.
[ She'd been worried for only a second or two that maybe he meant 'fine, go to the river on your own, then', and feels a sharp spike of relief when she hears him call her name.
Peter is a friend. She trusts him and she likes him, which is a rare combination not everyone can earn so easily.
A spectacular feat on his part really, considering he's a scientist. Eleven calls back: ]
Peter!
[ And makes her way over, steps hurried.
She may have snapped at him in her previous message, but relief is written all over her face at his sight. ]
[ she's relieved to see him, whilst he's relieved to ee her. when she hurries over to him, his posture and expression relax all at once, the tension draining out of his limbs and he shoves a hand into a pocket. he doesn't reply, not immediately; instead he exhales and looks away from her, towards the river. they don't need to get close to the water — it's too dangerous — but just close enough to be able to record the sound. that's fine. that's not a problem, and frankly, recording sound is one of the least complex things he's tried to do with the tablets. it shouldn't take long.
it's everything that comes after that's the issue.
he frowns and looks back at eleven. there's an undercurrent of frustration, although he wouldn't be able to put his finger exactly on why. (concern? sure, but that's not all.) ]
You thought I was going to leave you to do this alone? [ he doesn't exactly sound surprised when he asks the question, more searching. a little doubtful. a breath of a pause, and he adds: ] Of course I came. I don't think it's a good idea, but—. [ he shifts his weight and leans against the railing. good ideas are in pretty short supply in beacon, apparently. the remark lingers for a second; there are half a dozen buts he can add to that, none of them anything he can really air to eleven. eventually, then— ] —But I'm here.
[ No... No, she didn't, Eleven thinks. Not really, not fully.
Peter is a friend, and a good one. He's her teacher. He cares, and he can be trusted. He's something she shouldn't like, something she should stay far away from, and yet... and yet she can't help it, can't help but want to look beyond what he is, because she so very much likes who he is.
Her trust, her full, true trust, is hard-earned, and he's managed, somehow.
Eleven reaches out and puts a hand on his arm. She won't forget this. If he ever needs someone by hisside when he wants to do something that's not a good idea, she'll make sure to be there. ]
I know you... don't like it. But. I need you to trust me.
[ Her face is much less childlike here, like this, than it can be when they study or go for ice cream. The girl that looks back at him now has already put her life on the line countless times for the people she cares about. The girl that looks back at him now will stop at nothing to ensure the safety of her loved ones.
The girl would not hesitate to die for him, either. ]
[ peter knows she's been through a lot — he might not know all of the details, but he knows enough.
his first thought is that it's not that he doesn't trust her, it's that he doesn't trust beacon. it's that he doesn't trust not knowing if this will work, if she'll be okay — by a definition of the word 'okay' — at the end of it. but then he knows that a part of it is trust in her; trust that she knows when enough is enough; when it's too much and she should stop. when she has a responsibility to herself as well as other people.
it had taken him a long time to come to any semblance of understanding for that with regards to himself and he still struggles with it. (thy name is hypocrite.) he'd been older than eleven, too, and everything to do with him had been more of a choice than anything eleven's ever had.
there's a small voice in the back of his head, one that manages to sound a little like mj, that tells him that he needs to stop trying to make decisions for other people based on what he thinks is right. ]
—I don't like being dragged out of my warm, toasty bed when it's dark outside. [ he comments, glancing down at the hand on his arm. there's a quirk of his lips that almost forms into a smile; the unsaid sentiment is that this isn't quite a case of like versus dislike, but—
he's not actually going to say that in as many words. ] But I'm willing to concede it's always dark here, so I only half-dislike being dragged out of my warm, toasty bed. [ beat; a huff of breath. ] So. Running water, right?
[ For the second time since they've met one another, Eleven's thin arms wind around his middle, and she squeezes for a moment, before detaching herself and moving closer to the railingof the bridge.
Eleven is relieved to know him here, and more relieved that he's going back to saying things she can only half follow at the best of times. Peter is a good teacher and a better friend. She might call him her best friend, but he's old and there's Max at home, but... well, maybe he can be her Best Beacon Friend.
Yeah, that works. ]
Yes. Water. Radios are... better, but.
[ She shrugs. They must work with what they have. ]
[ and for the second time, peter's startled by her suddenly giving him a hug. there's a breath of a pause before he hugs her back before she lets go. he's always had a soft spot for children, but he tries not to think about how his position at midtown high got cut short; he tries not to think about the conversation he'd had with mj. he glances down at the water: they'll have to be pretty quiet whilst they record the sound, but in and of itself, that's the easy thing.]
Can I have your tablet? [ he asks, looking back at eleven, at the top of her head. at least, he thinks, if he's here, he'll know she's safe — and if she's not, then maybe he can do something about it. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
@eleven | text (backdated to Nov 3)
can you help me with something
its about the tablet machines
and you know stuff
please
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static
like radios or water or fridges
can i have that on the machine
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[ THAT IS weirdly specific. ]
I can do water -- the river, or waves?
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river i think
running showers worked before
radios are best but
it just needs to be steady
rushing
do you understand
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Do you mind if I ask why?
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This isn't really something we've discussed, so I need to ask just so I know.
And don't mistake this for me saying no, but:
Is this going to be dangerous at all?
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i can go into the void
its a space in my mind
i control it
i can look at people and they dont know
i can talk to them if i want
[ ... don't lie. ]
it used to be safe
but some things can reach back
powerful things
i died in the void
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sure is a whole lot to take in.
his reply doesn't come immediately, because his immediate reaction is no, absolutely not, but equally he knows that he can't stop her. he knows that if he doesn't help, someone else will, and he'll be shut out from anything in the future. this isn't like melissa, where he could just web her bedroom window shut and know that would be it for an hour or so.
he knows what it was like, being eleven's age and wishing he was able to change things. he'd been a lot more selfish, a lot more arrogant, but the underlying desire had been the same.
there's the question, though, of whether her lantern would go with her, whether the mental representation of herself would be enough to harm her given the physics of this place are different to the laws and physics of earth.
(he hopes not. there's a chance it's safer here than it was back there.) ]
What can reach back? How?
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i can find things and people in other places
i found something once and i touched it
it opened a door to the upside down
the demogorgon came through and later the mind flayer into hawkins
i closed the door last year but the mind flayer could still reach
it flayed billy and when i looked for billy it could look back
and when i touched billy in the void it could touch back
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[ who's billy? is one question, but it's not one he asks because that doesn't seem to be the important thing here.
(god, he hates it when things are serious, with a capital-S, and it's not something he can avoid, or deflect, or evade, or joke about. eleven's a child, and all of his coping mechanisms for discomfort would be insensitive.) ]
I don't need to tell you this doesn't make me very comfortable, right?
I mean, I get it. You want to help. You think you can help.
You saw the messages - someone knows where he is. They're saying he's safe.
So what happens if Riku doesn't want to be found right now? Doesn't want to be seen?
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i dont need permission
i can go to the river with a blindfold and do it on my own
but i want the sound on the machine to be safer
do you help or do i go alone
1/2
2/3 i lied. i always lie.
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River.
1/2
2/2 moving to action
Eleven is scared - but determined, too. And she wants to ask Peter to be there, to watch over her when she sits down and blindfolds herself and listens to the static and goes in the Void in her mind, so she knows that if something goes wrong, she can tell someone out loud...
But maybe it's dumb to ask him, now.
Maybe she will do it more like Bruce. Carry things alone in the dark. Accept help if offered, don't ask for it. Become familiar with the pain, and become stronger because of it.
Maybe.
Those are the thoughts she's lost in when she makes it to the bridge, looking around for Peter's bright light in the dark. ]
no subject
which means: he hurries to the river, determined not to miss eleven, not to leave her waiting. he thinks that if he does, she'll do something reckless. something he'll end up feeling responsible for because he said the wrong thing, or wasn't quick enough, all because she's just a child and she wants to help.
he knows, loosely, what she's capable of — not with this, but in terms of sheer strength, and he knows that if it came down to it, he might not be able to stop her.
when he gets there, then, he's breathless; his eyes are wide and searching and his hair messy, as if he's just run a hand through it in a vain, vague attempt to make himself look a little more presentable and half-assed it, not entirely bothered with the result. not for the first time, he thinks that something like this would be a hell of a lot easier back in new york. ]
—Eleven! [ is what he calls out when he spots the glow of a lantern on the bridge; it's a little too far away for him to pick out details, but the likelihood of it being anyone else are pretty slim.
(he hopes.) ]
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Peter is a friend. She trusts him and she likes him, which is a rare combination not everyone can earn so easily.
A spectacular feat on his part really, considering he's a scientist. Eleven calls back: ]
Peter!
[ And makes her way over, steps hurried.
She may have snapped at him in her previous message, but relief is written all over her face at his sight. ]
You came.
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it's everything that comes after that's the issue.
he frowns and looks back at eleven. there's an undercurrent of frustration, although he wouldn't be able to put his finger exactly on why. (concern? sure, but that's not all.) ]
You thought I was going to leave you to do this alone? [ he doesn't exactly sound surprised when he asks the question, more searching. a little doubtful. a breath of a pause, and he adds: ] Of course I came. I don't think it's a good idea, but—. [ he shifts his weight and leans against the railing. good ideas are in pretty short supply in beacon, apparently. the remark lingers for a second; there are half a dozen buts he can add to that, none of them anything he can really air to eleven. eventually, then— ] —But I'm here.
no subject
Peter is a friend, and a good one. He's her teacher. He cares, and he can be trusted. He's something she shouldn't like, something she should stay far away from, and yet... and yet she can't help it, can't help but want to look beyond what he is, because she so very much likes who he is.
Her trust, her full, true trust, is hard-earned, and he's managed, somehow.
Eleven reaches out and puts a hand on his arm. She won't forget this. If he ever needs someone by hisside when he wants to do something that's not a good idea, she'll make sure to be there. ]
I know you... don't like it. But. I need you to trust me.
[ Her face is much less childlike here, like this, than it can be when they study or go for ice cream. The girl that looks back at him now has already put her life on the line countless times for the people she cares about. The girl that looks back at him now will stop at nothing to ensure the safety of her loved ones.
The girl would not hesitate to die for him, either. ]
no subject
his first thought is that it's not that he doesn't trust her, it's that he doesn't trust beacon. it's that he doesn't trust not knowing if this will work, if she'll be okay — by a definition of the word 'okay' — at the end of it. but then he knows that a part of it is trust in her; trust that she knows when enough is enough; when it's too much and she should stop. when she has a responsibility to herself as well as other people.
it had taken him a long time to come to any semblance of understanding for that with regards to himself and he still struggles with it. (thy name is hypocrite.) he'd been older than eleven, too, and everything to do with him had been more of a choice than anything eleven's ever had.
there's a small voice in the back of his head, one that manages to sound a little like mj, that tells him that he needs to stop trying to make decisions for other people based on what he thinks is right. ]
—I don't like being dragged out of my warm, toasty bed when it's dark outside. [ he comments, glancing down at the hand on his arm. there's a quirk of his lips that almost forms into a smile; the unsaid sentiment is that this isn't quite a case of like versus dislike, but—
he's not actually going to say that in as many words. ] But I'm willing to concede it's always dark here, so I only half-dislike being dragged out of my warm, toasty bed. [ beat; a huff of breath. ] So. Running water, right?
no subject
Eleven is relieved to know him here, and more relieved that he's going back to saying things she can only half follow at the best of times. Peter is a good teacher and a better friend. She might call him her best friend, but he's old and there's Max at home, but... well, maybe he can be her Best Beacon Friend.
Yeah, that works. ]
Yes. Water. Radios are... better, but.
[ She shrugs. They must work with what they have. ]
no subject
Can I have your tablet? [ he asks, looking back at eleven, at the top of her head. at least, he thinks, if he's here, he'll know she's safe — and if she's not, then maybe he can do something about it. ]
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